I always think that I’m good with words. I can write beautiful sentences that can convey my true, exact feelings. I can even construct sentences that will force people to think and reflect. That’s quite an achievement I think, I mean, being able to move people is an honour, bestow by God Al-Mighty.
But lately, the gift is lost. (See, I’m at lost to explain it). Because I haven’t read much these past 2 years, I haven’t pruned my skills. I also do not have the ability anymore; can it be God already took it away? (Owh my God – nauzubillah).
Simply, I think, I don’t have a heart anymore. The heart is everything for me. I’m not a logical person like one of my best friends. I also do not possess the magic of writing with the flair like the other one. I wear my heart on my sleeve.
Where have you been? Are you trying to leave me? Are you sick? Are you simply vanishing into a thin air and leaving me stranded? Or are you playing a hide-and-seek game? Do you really have to disappear at this crucial moment? Don’t toy with me; you know that I’m not strong enough without you.
And where are you at the time where I need you the most? Life is black without you. No more a rainbow. Or prism. At least, a prism will shine when the light goes through it. And the best prism is you.
But, if, the manifestation of kun fayakun is indeed that you will be disappear, so be it.
p/s: ini ler ghopanyer kalau patah hati. I hate it. Thus, don’t ever fall in love with football. It is useless. Damn worthless. Damn hopeless.